Finally, enlightened.

Hello, so I did up a blog post on the 7 months I spent in CAG but still contemplating if I should post it. Tbh, I think Im gna leave it in the draft because I dont want to get into trouble just cos I share my experience hahaha.

Well, this is probably gna be a post where i ramble and ramble and ramble even more. So school starts tomorrow and I am not ready. Charlie is on afternoon shift tomorrow and I can safely say that I am still not over the fact that intern+extension has ended and I have to go back to the hell hole :"(

Before internship, I have to admit that I was afraid that I have to suck it up and go through the 5 months. I work before many different part time jobs and I will end up dreading it and eventually quit. I was scared that I was gna have the same problem during intern and will be counting down the number of days left in for intern. But, thank god I chose the right company to work in and I even miss working there now. I have to admit that I feel damn lucky having an internship that I rlyrly enjoy cos usually also hear people complain about their internship and all. I also felt that I have grown quite abit and its a good thing. 

Intern has also enlightened me and kinda set a path for me. People who know me will know that I dont have a direction and when people ask me what I want to do in the future, I will usually go "I dont know".  At least now I know that I want to continue pursuing the same thing in University. I used to think that I dont fit this industry or that I am not good just because my grades reflect so. I will always think about switching focus when i go university, or even getting another diploma. Thankfully, this internship showed me that I do rly enjoy the hospitality & tourism industry. 

Being in a team with ten other interns, I am surrounded by other poly students who are pursuing different diplomas in other poly. All of us, or at least some of us, are lost sheeps. I dont feel so alone after that. I pressured myself to try to decide on something that I want to do in the future and it obviously didnt work. I just feel very unsure about the future and I rly dont want to make any stupid decisions that will make myself unhappy in the future. 

Jiahui would probably have heard me going crazy about not knowing where to go and what to do when we go on grounds. Not alot of people understand how not having a goal in life is making me restless and crazy and scared. I dont know if she understand anot la but she will just listen and calm me down every single time I tell her how stressed I am about my future.

Amanda has also been someone I confine in and get advice from. I guess there is just something about her that makes me listen and think about the things she say. She has also tried to ask me and help me decide on the path I want to take in the future. She even gave me a survey to do, which I forgot what was the result. 

Ok so there was a period of time during intern when I got into trouble and couldnt wait for intern to end. I even download a count down timer to count the number of days Im left with. But then, I was back to the cass before that incident. Ya, I was so fucking traumatized that even talking about it now makes me a little scared?

See how much I loved what i was doing? I even extended & maxed out the pay cap lor. But all good things must come to an end someday I guess. AND I HAVE TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL :"( Confirm the intern feels will be damn strong tomorrow or at least when Im damn stressed out sighpiez

This phase of my life will probably be one of the most impactful one. But still too young to say la hahahaha I am sure there will be some life changing event in the future but so far, its internship. Thankful to be able to finally discover something that I enjoy doing and to meet some amazing people hehe

I know this post damn messy but just try to read la. I very lazy formatting it hahaha. I have to head to bed already goodnight x