horrible

im feeling really sucky now. and guilty. sigh. maybe its one of those night where i think too much again but i dont think so. i feel like a horrible friend and a horrible girlfriend :( bumped into my whole group of friends at tiong bahru plaza on my way to baskin robbins. and i totally forgot Nicky was gonna leave tonight for Australia to study and i didnt even see him and go to him in the whole group of them. so i didnt have the chance to say a proper bye to him *inserts super guilty emoji* im so sorry nicky, though i know you might never see this. shit i feel horrible now, really really horrible :'( 

its all my fault. everything. im always complaining and whining and taking things for granted :( and in the end up hurting the one i love cos of my insensitivity. i've said this like a million times now, my own insensitivity is ruining me. honestly sometimes i really feel that im the worst girlfriend anyone can ever have. why would anyone want me? really. i hate me.